Coach Yourself- An Introduction To
Life Coaching
I have written this for anyone who is
curious about the benefits of life coaching. It is intended as an
introduction to coaching to help you decide if it could help you.
(The advice given is not intended to
replace any given by your doctor or therapist. )
What is Life Coaching?
I am not going to write a long
description of what life coaching is. You can Google 'Life Coaching'
to find many great descriptions. This is intended to be practical.
You can try the exercises suggested and see if they help you.
Let's Get Started!
In the introduction to
life coaching at the start of this blog, you carried out an exercise where you were asked to
complete a short questionnaire to help you to identify the areas of your life that
you might wish to improve. Many of us find that we would
like to make changes that will help us to improve our health.
How Life Coaching Can Help You To
Improve Your Health
It is important that you read the
introduction before reading this blog post as the introduction has a
lot of useful general advice on how to identify, set and reach goals. This goal setting can easily be applied to health goals.
This blog post is intended to help you
to make positive changes in the area of health.
It does not cover every health issue
and is not intended to replace any advice you have been given by a
doctor or health professional.
Diet
We may decide
that we wish to make changes in our diet in order to be healthier.
It is helpful to
be very clear on what changes we wish to make and why.
It may be that
you wish to change your diet as some elements of your existing diet
are not working well for you. When making changes in diet it is
important that you seek the right advice. Cutting something
out of your diet can have benefits but it can also have drawbacks.
While we tend to
eat too much fat in our modern diets we need some fat in our diet to
help us absorb important vitamins.
Once you have
decided what changes you wish to make you can create a plan with
clearly set out steps to help you succeed.
Let's take
fictional character Tom as an example.
Tom used to be
very sporty and had an active job. This meant that although he had a
big appetite he remained fit and healthy as he burned off many of the
calories he was taking in.
A back injury
led to him giving up his active job and his sporting interests but he
kept eating the same types of food and the same portions that he had
eaten when he was more active.
This led to him
putting on weight and feeling very sluggish which put him off even
doing gentle exercise that he was still capable of.
Tom has decided
that he is fed up feeling this way so his goal is to eat a healthier
diet and to take more exercise so that he stops feeling sluggish and
becomes fitter.
He would benefit
from checking with his doctor before starting a new exercise
programme to ensure the new form of exercise wont make his back
injury worse.
Tom could then
decide what form of exercise he enjoys. Swimming could be a good
option as the water would support his back or maybe a gentle but
regular walk would benefit him.
Once he has
decided on his preferred form of exercise he needs to find time for
it in his day.
Maybe he could
enrol a friend to join him in this activity as this is likely to
motivate him to continue exercising regularly.
It is also
important for him to start off gently and gradually build up the
amount of exercise he takes.
If he has a bad
day and does not feel like exercising, that's OK. It is important if
we have a setback that we don't abandon our goal. If we have a few
off days then we can start back up where we left off when we feel a
bit better.
With exercise, taking one small step often leads to us feeling able to take another
step and then another.
Exercise can be
motivating in itself.
Walking has many
benefits. It is good for our bones as well as our cardiovascular
system. It boosts our circulation as well as burning calories. It is
also very good at lifting our mood as walking helps reduce stress.
Swimming also
has many benefits. It is excellent for muscle toning and as you are
supported by the water, it is excellent exercise for many people who
have injuries.
Once Tom has
started his exercise regime he can revisit his goal regularly to see
how he is progressing. Is he exercising too much, too little or does
he think he has got it about right?
Reviewing our
progress and adjusting our goals as we go can really help us to get
the most out of life.
If circumstances
change we can adjust our plans to suit the new situation.
It is important
to reward small successes in a way that will motivate us.
Tom really likes
going to London. He finds the city exciting, with lots to interest
him.
Maybe after an
agreed period of exercising Tom could reward himself with a trip to
London?
Only we can
decide what rewards will motivate us. The reward doesn't need to be
big or expensive but just enough to help us to celebrate our success
and help us to feel we are succeeding.
Sleep
Sleep is another area that really can
affect our emotional well-being as well as our physical health.
Opinion varies on how much sleep
benefits us but most of us know roughly how much sleep we need and
therefore how much sleep to aim for. The amount of sleep we need
varies from person to person and as we age the amount of sleep we
need changes too. Most adults gain from having between 7 and a half
hours to 9 hours sleep per night. Teenagers require even more!
Sleep loss takes its toll on your mood,
your ability to cope with stress and your problem solving abilities.
It can also affect your physical health.
While you sleep your body repairs and
maintains itself. Lack of sleep can affect your ability to fight
infections. A chronic lack of sleep can even lead to weight gain.
The quality of your sleep is important
too. It can be helpful to keep a sleep diary where you record when
you went to bed and what time you wake up so you develop a clear
picture of how much sleep you are getting.
Factors that affect deep sleep include
noise, drinking alcohol or smoking just before bed, drinking
caffeinated drinks, night shifts and having artificial light on while you
try to sleep.
Avoiding TV and computer screens just
before you go to bed can help you sleep well. Keeping your room cool
and quiet enough can also help.
At different stages of our lives our
hormones can affect the amount of sleep we get. Women going through
the Menopause can find the fluctuating hormone levels affect their
ability to sleep and some experience night sweats which tend to keep
them up at night.
Going to bed and getting up at the same
time each day can help your body to develop a healthy sleep pattern.
Reducing fatty and sugary foods can also help.
A diet rich in magnesium and calcium
can aid sleep.
Relaxation techniques such as yoga and
meditation can also really help.
There are also herbal remedies as well
as medications that can be prescribed by your doctor where needed.
If you are having difficulty sleeping, see if you can identify ways to improve your sleep pattern. For some
people going for a walk before bed can help and for others a warm
caffeine free drink before bed can really help to relax them.
Find what works for you and try to
ensure you get the sleep you need.
If you have a young baby or you are a
carer for someone who gets up a lot at night it can be very difficult
to get as much sleep as you need. If at all possible ask people to
help you. Maybe other family members can babysit sometimes or help
look after the person that you care for.
If you are not getting the sleep that
you need to function properly then you will not be able to help
anyone else.
It is important that you care for
yourself as well as other people. If you weren't here then everyone
else would have to find a way to cope so surely it must be possible
to make some adjustments to ensure that you get a little more sleep?
As with making any changes. It is
helpful to be very clear on what you are trying to achieve. It may be
that you are wishing to establish a more effective sleep routine or
you wish to make changes in your life to allow yourself an hour extra
sleep per night.
Once you are clear on your goal you can
work out small achievable steps to reaching that goal.
Once you start to succeed, reward
yourself and this will motivate you to continue with your plan.
Review your sleep plan regularly to see if you need to adjust it and
try not to be too down on yourself at the times when things don't go
exactly to plan. There are times in our lives where we all go without
enough sleep and in the short term that is fine. In the long term it
is important that you do establish a healthy sleep pattern to ensure
you are as healthy as you can be.
Mandy is another of my fictional
characters. She is a young mum who has a very young baby called
Bobby. Bobby wakes up a lot at night and her husband Mark rarely
hears him so Mandy is left to deal with Bobby on her own. Mandy is
starting to suffer the affects of sleep deprivation. She realises
that she needs to make changes. She talks to her friend Jill who
suggests that she develops a better bedtime routine for Bobby. A
relaxing bath and gentle music playing before bed helps him to get
off to sleep a lot more quickly which is a great start. Next, Mandy
asks her husband Mark for help and he agrees to get up every other
time their baby wakes up. When Mandy hears their son cry she will
wake Mark up if it is his turn so he can get up and settle the baby while Mandy gets some much needed sleep.
After a while, Mandy is starting to feel
better. She is able to think more clearly and realises that watching
TV until late at night isn't helping her own sleep routine. She
decides to go to bed with a warm drink and read a book for a little
while before dropping off to sleep. This really helps the quality of
her sleep. Her son becomes much more settled as he feels his mother
is more relaxed. He wakes up less at night which is good for Mandy
and for Mark. There are nights when Bobby feels unwell or is teething
when things seem to be going backwards. He can cry a lot on those
occasions but Mandy knows these nights are rare and they don't last
so all in all she feels a lot happier about her sleep routine.
You can see in this example that as you
start to resolve your sleep issues you start to feel better and your
brain starts to function better. This enables you to make further
changes. Mandy was also sensible enough to ask for help. We can be
tempted to soldier on alone and our family and friends can get used
to this and come to expect it even. By admitting that she needed help
as she didn't have all the answers, Jill and Mark were able to help Mandy. If you don't ask for help you will never know who may be
prepared and able to help you.
Water
Water is essential for our good health.
It increases energy, promotes weight loss, and boosts our immune
systems amongst other things. We should drink 6-8 glasses of fluid a
day. Fruit juice and milk can be included in this total and if you
don't like plain water you can try squeezing lemon or lime juice into
it.
If you have not been drinking enough
water why not challenge yourself to drink the correct amount of water
for a month and see how much better you feel? If you have not been
drinking enough water your body is likely to be experiencing one or
more of the following symptoms:
joint aches, chills,dull and dry skin,
headache, sugar cravings , dizziness and poor concentration.
If you are not used to drinking this
amount of water try drinking a little more water each day until you
build up to the required 2 litres or 6-8 glasses of water.
Like with any goal, be kind to yourself.
There may be days when you slip up and don't drink the agreed amount
of water. Simply get on track again the next day.
Reward yourself once you have completed
your month long challenge. Why not do something you enjoy and reflect
on how much better you feel now you are drinking the amount of water
that your body needs.
Exercise
Getting enough exercise is essential to
good health. Some people love exercising and go jogging or play a
sport. Some people like to go to the gym but other people really find
it hard to find exercise that they enjoy enough to keep up regularly.
There are many different forms of exercise and it can be fun trying
out different forms of exercise before settling on something that
works for you. Some people like dancing, others try yoga and walking
has enormous benefits. It strengthens your bones, lifts your mood and
improve your balance and coordination.
If you have not exercised for a long
time and are not very fit it would be a good idea to consult your
doctor to check that you are able to exercise safely.
When you start at a gym you are given
an induction to introduce you to the equipment and you are taught how
to use it safely.
With any exercise it is important to
warm your body up before exercising and then you carry out an
effective 'cool down' after exercise. This helps you to ensure that
you don't pull muscles or injure yourself by leaping into intense
exercise without this step.
Find a good time in the week that you
can set aside to exercise regularly. You may be able to join some
friends for a jog or you could meet up with a friend and you can walk
your dogs together.
Exercising with people can be
motivating for some people.
Be careful though because some people
seem enthusiastic about joining you at first and then they become
less enthusiastic and drop out. This can be demotivating for you.
If you start off by doing a little bit
of exercise, you can gradually build up the amount of exercise that
you do.
The wonderful thing about exercise is
that once you start to feel fitter you are more motivated to exercise
and it gets easier and more enjoyable.
Drug and Alcohol Addiction
Many people struggle with dependency on
alcohol or drugs. Some drugs are prescribed, some are legal and some
are illegal.
Drugs and alcohol alter our mood which
can be very compelling for many people . If you drink alcohol at a
party you may feel less shy and more uninhibited. This can be very
appealing but it is easy to allow drinking to become a habit and it
has some unpleasant side effects.
This can include liver problems, high
blood pressure and infertility.
If you think that you might have a
problems with alcohol or drug consumption there is help available to
you.
Around 2 million people in UK are
currently struggling with addictions. The NHS has a useful website
that gives help and advice so that you know where to turn to for
help. http://www.nhs.uk/livewell/addiction/Pages/addictionhome.aspx
Most countries have their own treatment
and services.
The important thing is to recognise
that you have a problem. It is then that you will be able to take
steps to get the help and support that you need.
If you are clear on your goals you will
be able to work out realistic steps for success.
People become dependent on substances
for a multitude of reasons and understanding your reasons will help
you with your recovery.
This blog is not intended to go into
detail. There are many specialist agencies that can help you to
recover from your addictions but as this area affects so many people
and their families I definitely wanted to include some information
here.
As with working towards achieving any
goal it is important to accept that there will be difficult days and
you may relapse. The key is to realise when things have taken a step
backwards, be gentle with yourself and get back on track as soon s
you can. Reward small successes and given time you are likely to see
improvements.
Getting Older
People's attitude to growing older
varies tremendously. Some people embrace it but others dread getting
older. For some people old age can bring significant health
problems while others experience financial hardship. These
difficulties do not apply to everyone but despite this many people
say that they dread ageing.
If you have a good support network of
friends and family then getting older is less likely to be a worry
but many people live alone and some experience loneliness.
Society can judge older people. So much
is decided by appearance these days so if you are going grey and are
getting a few wrinkles you can feel obliged to dye your hair and get
a 'face lift.'
While Cosmetic Surgery is an option, it
should not be taken lightly and no-one should feel pressured into
changing their appearance in any way.
I find getting older has its joys. I
have stopped dying my hair and have no intention of having any
cosmetic surgery. I find people appreciate me for the person I am and
not what I look like.
We can take steps to keep ourselves as
fit and healthy as possible. We can ensure we have a healthy diet
and get enough exercise. This should decrease our chances of
becoming ill.
You don't need to get involved in
extreme sports if you are not interested as brisk walking has
enormous health benefits.
Many people report that they appreciate
having grandchildren at least as much as having children . When we
have children we are completely responsible for their care but when
we have grandchildren we can help with their care but tend to have
less overall responsibility.
Of course some older people find
themselves becoming responsible for the care of their grandchildren.
This can be for a variety of reasons, including their child becoming
ill and unable to care for their children.
If we remember that getting older is a
life stage that has many positives as well as negatives, we are less
likely to dread ageing.
There are organisations such as Age UK
who can offer advice and support.
I believe that as we age we also get
wiser as we learn from our many life experiences. We learn to
appreciate the small things and realise that when we experience
setbacks these are unlikely to last as such things soon pass.
Getting older gives us some
perspective. Many people have the opportunity to travel or take up a
new hobby when they retire. This can enhance their lives enormously.
Some people choose to downsize in order
to free up some capital to spend on travel or on their family, for
example.
Whatever age we are we are still capable of learning new skills. In the past it was widely believed that once we got older our ability to learn cease but this is far from the case.
Life is a gift and we have many more wonderful life experience ahead of us as we age.
